Monday, 17 April 2017

Blogging and the Fear Of Missing Out

blogging and the fear of missing out #blogging #bloggingtips #problogger

This post started out as a comment left on the lovely The Sunday Girls blog and I just haven’t been able to shake the thought all day! Blogging. Blogging is one interesting roller coaster ride. The highs are cloud skimming euphoric, let’s do that again, moments. The lows are slow, stomach churning drops that make you wonder why you ever got on in the first place. Every high and low could be separate posts in their own right, but this one, this one is a low one, this one is the F.O.M.O drop, the fear of missing out.

You see the PR packages being ripped open on Instagram Stories, the un-boxings on YouTube. The latest mascara is doing the rounds on your feed, but it never fell through your letter box. No matter how many times we might say we don’t care about the numbers, we do. Of course we do. I don’t know how you can blog and not care at least a little bit about those numbers. These days, those numbers deem what you miss out on. There’s always something. 

Then there’s events. Usually, the ones you didn’t get invited to. You look through the hashtag, you see the selfies, and let’s be honest here, there will be more than one occasion you might stop scrolling and think, how the hell did they get an invite??

Let’s stop a sec. This isn’t a pity post. It’s a reality check. It’s to let you know that you’re not the only one thinking these things. You’re not the only one who didn’t get the package, who didn’t get the invite, who feels like their missing out. It’s one of the inevitable blogging frustrations that we all go through. How do you not feel this way?

There’s a crazy pressure in the blogging world these days to be on the bandwagon, to be whacking out posts on the latest trends, newest releases, filling your social media feeds with a LOOK OVER HERE, I DIDN’T MISS THIS ONE. And are we gratified? Validated? 

Briefly. Yes.

But it’s a fleeting moment, and then there we are, missing out again. 

Thing is, until, if ever, you reach the Zoella level of the game, you will always be missing out. 

Sometimes I think the more you blog, the more this fear creeps in, overshadowing all of the hard work and effort you’ve put into your little corner of the web. It leaves you despondent and disheartened. You forget all of the amazing opportunities you might have already had. 

This is where you need to try and draw the line. This is where you need to quash that fear. It’s not bloody easy. The fear is an unavoidable plummet. But you’ve got to remember that you chose to get on this roller-coaster, and every time it goes down it has to go back up. Just because you might have missed out on this bandwagon, doesn’t mean you won’t be on the next one to come along.

How to deal with blogging FOMO!

1. Switch off

Sounds like an obvious one, but you'd be amazed at how naturally self destructive humans are. It's so easy to set yourself up for the biggest pity party by continuing to scroll through your social media feeds, watch PR unboxings and see every blogger under the sun in the same pose on the same steps in London. When the FOMO is really setting in, don't intentionally go looking for events you haven't been invited to, it's only going to heighten the fomo-feels. Switch off your phone, log out of your social media, or even go as far as deleting the app for a while. Concentrate on you. On your blog, on what you love

2. Keep a 'I kicked ass at this' list

Not only is this really helpful to have to hand when approaching PR's, but it's also a great way of reminding yourself that you have had some amazing, perfectly suited to you opportunities already - and there are always more on the horizon. Keep a list of all the companies, brands, PR's and amazing people you have had the good fortune to work with over the course of your blogging journey. There was a time when you got an invite somebody else didn't. Just because you didn't make it to the latest round of PR packages doesn't mean the well has dried up. 

3. Make the first move

Don't sit around waiting for a brand or company to come along and woo you. It's a blogger eat blogger world out there, and there could be a reason other than the numbers, why a brand might not have approached you. I know many bloggers who grab the bull by the horns and send out enquiring emails and media kits to brands and companies they would love to work with. And you know what? More often than not they get a reply! It might not always be a package in the post, but you've made yourself known to them, you've been proactive, you've reached out and you've made that initial connection. Who knows where it might lead, but it's better than sitting around refreshing your inbox every 5 minutes. Set yourself a blogging to-do list right now, and try to come up with some brands and companies you would love to work with someday. 

4. Think about what defines YOU as a blogger

How do you want to be known in the blogging world? Is working with bigger and bigger brands really the cherry on the cake? Or would you prefer your audience got to know you? Is bagging that event invite more important than a blog post that actually helps someone? That inspires someone? Working with brands is considered the be all and end all when it comes to recognition, but you know what? I'd give a limb for someone to come up to me in the street and tell me a post of mine helped, inspired or encouraged them to do something other than buy a moisturiser I reviewed. 

5. Get your besties to give you a boost

Speak with your blogging best friends about how you're feeling. Chances are, they will be, or have, felt exactly the same as you. How did they get out of this FOMO rut? Or do you both need to give each other a helping hand? I always turn to my blogger WhatsApp groups when I feeling deflated about blogging and opportunites and those girls never fail to make me feel like my true, bad ass boss girl blogger-self! 

blogging and the fear of missing out. how do you deal with it when everyone else is getting invited to events and being sent PR packages and there's nothing but a tumbleweed blowing through your inbox? #blogging #bloggingtips #bloggerhelp

Blogging FOMO is a crappy feeling. It’s unavoidable. But it’s a blogging right of passage. We've all felt it at some point and we're sure to feel it again in the future. Remind yourself why you started blogging in the first place, can you reignite that fire that wasn't solely fuelled on how many PR's emailed you each day?  

How do you deal with blogging FOMO?

Until next time, 


  1. Fair point made but equally a lot of the FOMO comes from comparing yourself to others, a natural human instinct but one we should all try and stop x

  2. I just genuinely try and concentrate on myself and feel inspired that others are doing well xx

  3. It's hard to keep up with everything and I agree, you will miss some bits, but you can only do the best you can! Great post xx

  4. I know it sounds strange but I don't really get blogging f.o.m.o. - I'm not hugely active on social media so I don't see all of the PR parcels/events - I think I'll stay in my bubble! :-) xx


  5. I used to get it a lot, but lately I don't really care. I think blogging has taken a step back in importance for me over the last few months so I'm like whatever! Ha.

    Corinne x

  6. Totally know how you feel! Chin up and just focus on you! xx

  7. Sometimes with blogging you need to keep your head down and not worry about what other bloggers are getting or doing, as you said everyone lower than Zoella level misses out on something!

  8. I loved this post so much. I do just and focus on what I am doing for the majority of the time but totally do feel deflated now and again when I don't get certain opportunities, especially the ones I think I would really enjoy and write a killer post about. Xx

  9. Ah, thanks for your words!!! Yes, I've noticed this as well.... staying strong seems key, there must be a good reason for whatever happens working at your favour.
    x finja |